Duke Nukem Forever has gone Gold!

    Yup, Duke Nukem Forever, originally announced in 1997, has finally completed it's development. Having taken forever to complete, this game has been the butt-end for so many jokes throughout the years. Rather than repeating one the jokes, I'll just say "FINALLY!" I'm definitely getting the Balls of Steel edition.

http://www.pcworld.com/article/228552/duke_nukem_forever_goes_gold.html

Game Review - Beethoven's 2nd (SNES)

    For those of you who didn't grow up in the 90's, Beethoven was a movie series about a dog named Mozart. Actually no, it's Beethoven. This is a video game based on the second movie, and oh boy are you in for a hidden gem.

    This game is so amazing that I'm surprised they never made a game based on the other 5 movies, as far as I know. It's brilliantly paced, brilliantly animated, and the sound rivals that of any current-gen blockbuster title, and all this on an old, grey SNES cartridge. Heck, it's so awesome that the titles on the box and the title screen don't match up.

    One could argue that the movie series has the case of excessive sequel syndrome...and they'd be right, but I'll get to that another time.
 

    This game starts off with Beethoven trying to rescue one of his kids from...a roof - ABSOLUTE GENIUS! You're first obstacle is a fence. You either clear the fence completely or take damage. It's here where you find that the game has the greatest controls ever. Why, they're so good that you can't jump over the fence properly and that it's almost impossible to not get hurt here.

Destructoid's review of the new PS3 firmware update.

This is hilarious, read it!

http://www.destructoid.com/review-firmware-update-3-61-201186.phtml

X-23

    Wolverine with boobs and a chemical trigger; that’s one way to sum up my favorite Mavel comic character. It’s very misleading though. I briefly mentioned her in my previous review, but I feel like talking more about her just cause.

    X-23 is a child soldier character in the X-men franchise. For the first 13 years of her life, she was raised in a laboratory, trained as a killer, and used to kill all sorts of people for money. Eventually she escaped, and killed everyone that worked in the lab, and has since joined the X-men and is trying to overcome her upbringing and find her place in the world. Despite the fact that she was discouraged from any kind of attachment to anyone (the lab even forced her to kill her sensei and her mother,) she is learning compassion for others, even her enemies as of late, and is fiercely protective of her fellow X-men. Oh, and she happens to be a clone of Wolverine. Wait, what?

Game Review - X-Men: The Official Game (GBA version)

    X-Men: The official Game is a tie-in to X-Men 3: The Last Stand. As we all know, games based on movies are always amazing, right?

    To be fair, most movie-based games have a very limited development schedule, and are released at the same time as the movie. As a result, it's not usually the developers fault when the end result is lackluster at best. Most good movie-based games didn't even release with the movie, like Super Star Wars for example.

    So why would I seek out this game, knowing full well that it would likely suck? Curiosity. As I said in my somewhat crappy Deadpool post, I recently got into comics. Part of what pushed me into comics was Marvel Vs. Capcom 3, a recently released fighting game that pits Marvel comic characters against Capcom characters in one of the most anticipated games in the last decade (it's been eleven years since Marvel vs. Capcom 2 first released.) More specifically one character, introduced to me in MVC3, got me into comics - X-23. I'll likely talk more about her in the future, but to make long story short she's a child soldier character who was forced to kill people at a very young age. She eventually escaped the facility, and she's since joined the X-men...and she happens to be a clone of Wolverine. I couldn't really tell you why, but child soldier-type characters interest me, to the point that I've actually written fictional stories about my own characters like that in the past. Anyway, I was curious about X-men: The Official Game for the Game Boy Advance because it's actually X-23's first appearance in a video game.

    I've been babbling on enough though, it's time to start the review.

Movie Review - Turks in Space

    Well, I'm back. And what better way to return to this blog by reviewing Turks In Space, a movie I've planned on reviewing for a long time. I'm having trouble saving pictures right now, so I'll upload them when my computer is working better.

    Turks in Space is a Turkish science fiction action/comedy. However that's not the proper translation of the Turkish title. In fact, the Turkish title translates to "Son of the man who saved the world." Wait what? What kind of stupid title is that? Who cares about the son of the man who saves the world, why not just call it "The man who saved the world."

    Oh, that's why, there's already a movie called "The man who saved the world." I get it, it's a sequel. Does the original have a more common title? Why yes, it's Turkish Star Wars. Wait...I'm reviewing the official sequel to Turkish Star Wars? The bad movie I found more painful than Garbage Pail Kids? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

    Yeah, I already knew about this movie before I reviewed Turkish Star Wars, but I haven't reviewed this one until now for a good reason - this movie scares me. In fact, of all the bad movies I plan on reviewing, there is only one that scares me more than this one - I'll get to it eventually, but I'm not telling what it is yet. While Turkish Star Wars was painful enough, at least it was trying to be serious. It was fascinatingly bad, and in small parts it can be very entertaining. The plot was pretty simple, even if it was confusing. This movie is trying to spoof movies like Star Wars. Yes, a foreign ripoff/spoof of a movie that's over 30-years-old now.

School's busy

I probably won't be able to post here again for the next two weeks or so. I do have plans for after though, a number of movies I've been planning on reviewing for a while, and a few games as well. Until then, enjoy!

Movie Review - Bride of the Monster

    Hey kids, you know what time it is? It's Ed Wood time!

    Ed Wood is the world's most well known bad movie director. I'm just going to dive straight into this movie - if you want an introduction to Ed Wood, read my Plan 9 From Outer Space and Glen or Glenda reviews.

    Bela Lugosi stars as the mad scientist Dr. Eric Vornoff - the main bad guy. Bride of the Monster is also the first Ed Wood movie with Tor Johnson in it. Tor Johnson is the wrestler that played the giant zombie in Plan 9 from Outer Space, and primarily attacked people by slapping them in the shoulders. His role here is pretty similar here as Bela Lagosi's lab slave named Lobo. You'd think a wrestler would know other ways to take people down without hurting them, but whatever.